From Control to Surrender: Trusting God in the Waiting

Proverbs 3:5–6

“Trust in the Lord with all your heart
and lean not on your own understanding;
in all your ways submit to Him,
and He will make your paths straight.”

When Control Takes Over

A number of years ago, I found myself in a place I never expected to be.

Even though neither of us had been married before, my husband and I married later in life, and we knew we wanted children—two or three in fact. We prayed. We hoped. We tried. And along the way, we experienced multiple miscarriages—each one feeling like another blow to the family we believed we would have.

Nine years passed.

Once again, I sat in the office of a reproductive specialist, hoping this time would be different. But it wasn’t. The procedure hadn’t worked, and I was facing my sixth miscarriage.

I remember sitting there across from the doctor, hearing the words—but not fully feeling them yet.

I couldn’t cry. I couldn’t grieve.

What I felt instead surprised me: embarrassment and anger—not just at the situation, but at myself.

Somewhere deep inside, I had this sudden, piercing thought: Why have I worked so hard to control this instead of simply trusting God?

It was an honest moment. Not polished. Not pretty. Just real.

And then—unexpectedly—something shifted. Sitting there in that same chair, I began to feel more hopeful than I had in a long time—not because anything had changed, but because, for the first time, I was letting go.

The Turning Point

A few minutes later, the specialist’s nurse called me into a side room. She kindly suggested we try a different procedure—one that had worked for her and her husband.

I smiled, but I knew.

“Thank you—but I’ve been carrying all of this instead of giving it to the One who owns my soul. That changes today.”

The nurse looked at me with a hint of pity.

We had prayed, but our prayers had been casual; spoken while we tracked, planned, and tried to control every detail. We relied on timing, shots, methods, and outcomes. We said we trusted God, but in reality, we were still holding tightly to the process.

I remember driving home and quietly praying, Jesus, take the wheel—take it from my hands.

Later, my husband and I had one of the most important conversations we’ve ever had. We stopped talking about plans and timelines and started asking a different question: What are we actually asking God for?

For the first time, we began to pray differently—not just for a result, but with open hands. Scripture reminds us to pray persistently and with confidence, trusting not only in what God can do, but in how and when He chooses to move (Luke 18:1; Mark 11:24). Prayer is not a formula for control—it is an act of surrender. God answers, but always according to His wisdom and His purposes (James 5:15–16).

The desire of our hearts had not changed, but we chose to be satisfied with God’s response—whatever it might be.

A Faith That Waits

How could we not learn to trust whatever God chose for us, when long before us, a couple deeply devoted to the Lord had asked for the same blessing—and had to wait?

Zechariah and Elizabeth are described as “righteous… walking blamelessly in all the commandments of the Lord” (Luke 1:6). Their faithfulness was not built on outcomes, but on trust in who God is.

When the angel tells Zechariah they will have a son, he struggles to believe it. It’s a small but honest moment—one that reminds us even faithful people can wrestle with trust.

Still, God’s plan moves forward.

In time, Elizabeth gives birth to John—the one who would prepare the way for Christ. What once felt uncertain was always held in God’s hands.

Learning to Trust

In Proverbs 3:5–6, we are told: “Trust in the Lord with all your heart…” That phrase—all your heart—is where this becomes real.

Partial trust is easy. We trust God and keep a backup plan. We pray—but still try to control the outcome. We say we believe—but still lean heavily on what makes sense to us.

Which is exactly what the next line addresses: “Lean not on your own understanding.” This doesn’t mean thinking is bad. It means recognizing its limits. Our perspective is small. God’s is not. Trust begins where understanding ends.

“In all your ways submit to Him…” Not just the big decisions. Not just the crises. All your ways.

And that may be the hardest kind of trust—the kind that continues steadily, day after day, without immediate answers.

“He will make your paths straight.” Not necessarily easy. Not necessarily quick. But straight—guided, directed, purposeful. God is not absent in the waiting. He is working.

A Joyful Reminder

Less than six months after that decision to surrender everything to God, we found out we were pregnant.

In time, we welcomed a ten-pound baby boy into the world.

To this day, we are humbled by this gift—not as a formula or a guarantee, but as a reminder of God’s goodness and grace.

A Question to Sit With

When was the last time you truly trusted God in something uncertain—not just said you trusted, but actually released control?

Maybe it was a job situation, a relationship, or a decision you couldn’t fully see through.

And maybe, if you look back, you’ll realize something unexpected followed: peace—not because everything made sense, but because you weren’t carrying it alone anymore.

A Simple Practice for This Week

When uncertainty rises, pause and pray: “God, I don’t understand this—but I trust You with it.” Then take the next step in front of you without trying to control the whole path.

Sometimes the most faithful thing we can do is not figure it out—but trust the One who already has.

And one day, we may look back and see: He was working all along.

 

I’m Lauren—a writer, educator, and novelty quilter with over 30 years of experience in service and sales. I’ve taught high school English, worked as a journalist, and now run Artisan Shop USA, a marketplace supporting handmade artistry and the sharing of faith, family, and country. I’m also a wife, mom, and lifelong lover of storytelling.